Some photographers should be shot.
Especially a certain photographer at your brother's wedding who takes the most unfortunate picture of you and POSTS IT ON HIS WEB SITE FOR ALL FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO SEE!
It's like this...during Morgan's reception, my other brother Mitchell was playing around and caught me in a head lock, bending me backwards and holding me hostage. Because of the assault, my body was in an awkward position to start with...on top of the fact that being caught off guard I forgot all about 'sucking it in' which all girls know is a vitally important tactic whenever a camera is in the vicinity.
I was unaware that the photographer had cunningly snapped a shot of this exchange until I viewed the wedding pictures on his website last night and nearly slid out of my chair in horror. There I am...body twisted and distorted, shirt riding up and stomach showing.
Oh sweet jesus I want to die.
On the upside...if there was ever any motivation needed to lose weight...this was it.
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Ash and I are challenging eachother to a Biggest Loser style weight loss competition and we want you to see all the trash talk as it happens. Here's how to calculate: Week 1: 175 lbs Week 2: 170 lbs; percent: (175-170)/175 = 2.9% Week 3: 175 lbs; percent: (170-175)/175= -2.9% Week 4: 172 lbs; percent is NOT (175-172)/175 = 1.7%; the actual percent should be (X-172)/X = (170-172)/170 = -1.2%.
6 comments:
I have nothing to write about today so I think I'll end up putting this on my page too. I'm just so pissed off. That ASSHOLE. Use a little decency please!
I want to see this terrible picture.
That picture is never going to see the light of day. I forbade my parents from even thinking about buying it.
Oh no! I'm sorry to hear that. You know, I never do any sucking in for photos -- perhaps I should try that.
Oh, but I spent the day going through all my Paris photos from 5 months ago and I am so fat. It's terrible. I took this wonderful trip to Paris and now I don't want to show anyone my photos. Great, now every time I look at my photos and remember my first trip to Europe I'll be thinking "look, there's a cow in front of the Eiffel Tower." I hate photos.
I found one picture from my trip to Bangladesh 3 years ago, I sent it to Ashley. I was so fat, it looked like I was not only fatter, but also like I had a sweater on under my clothes. I think we should all share our fat photos, you can blank your face if you're shy.
Oh no, my face is the fattest part of me -- I would have to show that. But, yeah, I'm game.
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